


love, i have wounds only you can mend

by DarkestTomorrow



Category: In the Flesh (TV)
Genre: M/M, So yeah, he's so obsessed i can't deal, kind of a window into simon's precious and vulnerable and besotted mind, simon being adorably and heartbreakingly in love, this wouldn't leave me alone until i typed it up
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-14
Updated: 2014-09-14
Packaged: 2018-02-17 09:18:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 616
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2304575
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkestTomorrow/pseuds/DarkestTomorrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A pretty short piece of work examining the inner workings of Simon Monroe's thoughts - & mainly just how goddamn in love he is with a certain Kieren Walker.</p><p>-<br/><em> And then he’s kissing him and he’s so afraid. So afraid that it’s just a dream. That he’s some magical illusion that’ll disappear if he isn’t careful, and his heart is bursting into a million pieces even as it soars. And he worships him and he doesn’t know how to stop. </em></p>
            </blockquote>





	love, i have wounds only you can mend

**Author's Note:**

> I kept watching this magnificent siren video on YouTube (Simon & Kieren | Can't Pretend) and watching this spectacular gif of their first kiss and I literally could not do ANYTHING but think of this goddamn ship. Like at all. So I had to write this - as a form of closure or something. Ffs this ship is driving me crazy.

He’s been so _lonely_. So goddamn lonely. His entire life. He felt worthless - like he didn’t belong. Like he was just this tiny smudge in this huge, crazy world of colour. Like no one needed him there; disposable. Expendable. And there was no one he loved and no one who loved him, and it was the saddest, most tragic existence one could fathom. And the darkness was so overwhelming that he couldn’t take it anymore. He didn’t want it anymore. He wanted to see some light, and if this were the only way then so be it.

And then there’s finally relief.

But it’s short-lived, because he’s come back and it’s worse than ever. Their eyes don’t glaze over him anymore. No. Instead, they stare at him. So many eyes turned hatefully towards him, brimming with revulsion and fear and disgust and pity and it’s so bad, _so bad_ , and he almost wishes they would glaze over again. To just see straight through him, like he isn’t even there.

But then all of a sudden, _they_ are there and they’re telling him that he matters. That he means something, _he can do something_. There’s a purpose to his existence. An end game. He isn’t just stumbling around in this vast expanse of nothingness. He’s important. And he’s so happy he could burst. He finally _belongs_. He has a family now, so much stronger, so much thicker than blood. And they want him and they accept him and there’s _finally_ light. And he’s so grateful – so indebted – to these people who have welcomed him into their circle. He would do anything to prove his devotion, his loyalty. He would prove to them that he’s worth the effort – he would never let them down.

But then he meets _him_ and his world is suddenly falling off its axis again. But not in the terrible way that it did _before_. This time, it’s beautiful. Miraculous. There’s this magnificent, glorious creature before him who is so good, _so pure_ , and suddenly nothing makes sense anymore. He wants to take him in his arms and shield him from all the evil of this terrible world. And he’s listening to how his before was and his heart is breaking and it takes all of his self-restraint to not envelop him in his arms and hold him until he realises how special, how beautiful he is.

And then he’s kissing him and he’s so afraid. So afraid that it’s just a dream. That he’s some magical illusion that’ll disappear if he isn’t careful, and his heart is bursting into a million pieces even as it soars. And he worships him and he doesn’t know how to stop. He wants to love him, to hide him away and never let the darkness touch him. He wants to make him feel loved, wanted. He’s trying desperately to make sure that _he_ doesn’t feel insignificant. No, he’s suffered through that pain and he’ll be damned if he ever let him feel that way for even a second. So he’s taking him in his arms, hesitantly, cautiously. Because all of a sudden, this strange, brave boy has become a necessity to his existence, and he’s certain that had his heart still pumped, it would’ve refused to do so without Kieren Walker. His hands tremble even as he reaches out to him, wanting desperately to hold him, to let his touch say everything he’s too ashamed to say. That he worships him with the fire of a thousand blazing stars and that he’ll save him. He’ll save him – even if it costs him his new life, his new purpose. Because there’s what he believes…and then there’s him.


End file.
